Talking to your parents or another trusted adult can really help, too.
For more on sex, safer sex, abstinence, birth control, and healthy relationships, visit the links below in Further Reading.
When it comes to dating after 60, it often feels like women face a choice between intimacy and independence. Certainly, many of the women in the Sixty and Me community have pushed back whenever I have raised this topic. Gabriel García Márquez once said that “Everyone has three lives: a public life, a private life, and a secret life.” Then, with great insight, he added that our “secret life” is often the one that we keep from ourselves.
So, now that I am in my 60s, I want to explore my own secret life and, in doing so, answer a question that many other boomer women are asking: “What do I value more in life – independence or intimacy?
If you want to feel closer to your partner than ever before and bridge the connection gap, try these ideas: 1. By reminding them of why you appreciate them, you’re also reminding yourself of all of their wonderful qualities. Suggest a regular Date Night, go for long walks together or start a creative project together. The harder you work at developing and keeping intimacy in your relationship, the more rewarding it can be.Intimacy outside of the bedroom can occur in so many different ways.These moments aren’t usually amazing, mind blowing experiences, but instead the little moments where you know that you share something special; when you become aware that the person looking back at you makes you feel incredible. Connecting on shared memories is a fantastic way to keep sparks flying. When you face an obstacle in your relationship, sit down with your partner and calmly discuss the issue.It happens when you feel comfortable enough to let your guard down and share feelings that you’ve never shared with anyone else before, or when they see you at your lowest point and are still there to support you. Flick through vacation photos or recall your first date. Or if you’re a relatively new couple, share memories from your childhood that reveal the story of who you are. What would it take for both of you to feel content with a resolution?It’s when you experience comfortable silences – not needing to fill every space with words, but being content just being with each other. Plan it together (even if there’s no way that you can afford it, play pretend and plan it anyway). Couples who actively involve themselves in the betterment of their relationship (rather than ignoring problems) generally feel more connected and loving towards each other overall.