“We would catch eyes every now and then.” When her plane landed back in New York the next day, she already had a message from him.
They exchanged flirtatious banter over text for a week or so before he asked her to go out with him on Monday, September 25. The night would end with Grace in an Uber home, in tears, messaging her friends about how Ansari behaved.
“Most of my discomfort was expressed in me pulling away and mumbling.
I know that my hand stopped moving at some points,” she said.
“It was 30 minutes of me getting up and moving and him following and sticking his fingers down my throat again. It felt like a fucking game.” Throughout the course of her short time in the apartment, she says she used verbal and non-verbal cues to indicate how uncomfortable and distressed she was.
Grace said it was surreal to be meeting up with Ansari, a successful comedian and major celebrity, and she was “excited” for their date.
Before meeting Ansari, Grace told friends and coworkers about the date and consulted her go-to group chat about what she should wear to fit the “cocktail chic” dress-code he gave her.
’ and I go, ‘Oh, yeah, sure,’ and he goes, ‘Well, if I poured you another glass of wine now, would it count as our second date? “I said I don’t want to feel forced because then I’ll hate you, and I’d rather not hate you,” she said.
’” He then poured her a glass and handed it to her. Grace says she spent around five minutes in the bathroom, collecting herself in the mirror and splashing herself with water. And then, as he rose to prominence, he focused less on his own sexual disenfranchisement and more on pressing societal issues like racism and sexual assault, a move that’s earned him tons of praise.