I apologized, signed out of the chatroom, and started dinner.But even though that incident really bothered me, I still didn’t stop.Her main goal in life is to try to figure out what her partner wants, and then give it to him.To assure success at pleasing, she may become extremely sensitive to the momentary mood of her partner.I didn’t realize it was already eight o’clock when my younger son asked, “When are we going to eat? Until that moment, I hadn’t realized how much my visits to the chatroom were getting in the way of our family life. ” I thought it had just been 20 minutes, but when I glanced at the clock, I discovered I’d been online for more than five hours. My response to my son’s innocent question should have clued me in: I was spending way too much time on the Internet.Sex addicts usually choose relationships with partners who unconsciously fit right into the addictive patterns.For example, typically the sex addict keeps on returning again and again to the sexually addictive behaviors and the partner accepts what is going on, or overlooks clues that would suggest something is wrong, or threatens to leave but doesn't (or leaves and returns when the addict promises to change, only to learn later the addict did not stop), or takes responsibility for trying to control the addict's behavior.
A phrase that is used to describe a woman or a man in relationship with a sexual addict is a codependent of a sex addict, or co-addict.My introduction to Internet use began when I was trying to find an appropriate chatroom for my older son. Within days, this chatroom became my favorite “place” to be.Intrigued, I sat in front of the computer one evening and asked him to show me how to chat. While I began spending every spare minute on the Internet, my family began eating more boxed and frozen meals than homemade ones. The internet fills a need for "more, easier and better." For the cybersex addict, increasing amounts of time are spent "surfing," downloading, creating files, masturbating, reading information posted on sexual bulletin boards, exchanging sexual information live with others in sexual chat rooms or via computer cameras, or directing their own live sex shows on interactive sites--in short, looking for what's new, what's better than last time. The Internet has become the newest, most rapidly growing form of sexual acting out for many sex addicts.